Every film studio enjoys remakes a lot…
But this critic who must watch them all, does not.
Before you might think that his heart is too small,
Let’s look at the Grinch, the rise and the fall.
We had all we need with Seuss and Chuck Jones
The Grinch was perfect in that stand-alone.
Jim Carrey came ’round with a version so rotten,
It came and it went and soon was forgotten.
Now a critic can’t help but share their opinion,
About a rebooted classic from the makers of Minions.
I don’t know where to begin, there is oh so much wrong,
The FILLER, the SUBPLOTS, the HUMOR, THE SONGS!
Instead of Karloff, we get Cumberbatch
It seems a good fit, but he’s really miscast
Instead of the essence of villainy achieved,
He’s perhaps slightly bothered, occasionally peeved.
Kids will like it, and you should be quite nervous
If you subject them to it, I’ll call family service.
Children deserve better, to see a villain so dark
If there’s no major growth, there’s no character arc.
If you want their brains to grow two sizes more,
Don’t make them watch this uninspired cash-grab bore.
Because there’s no care and it’s unnecessary,
I’m giving this version of the Grinch a straight D.
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